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What are the Biggest Mistakes in a Divorce?

posted July 25, 2016
While no one is perfect, how you handle a divorce can still impact you
years later. A divorce is the breakdown of a failed relationship, so hard
feelings can easily fester and escalate. Many couples end up in a high
conflict divorce because they can’t agree on fundamental aspects, even
though they stayed in the marriage for years.

Often individuals regret having fought for so long after the initial separation.
They may not have understood how their actions would affect their children,
their own relations, and their financial future. Learning from others’
experiences can help you to avoid falling into the same trap. Some of the
biggest mistakes made by couples in Edmonton include choosing the
wrong divorce lawyer, starting off with a bang, being unaware of the family
finances, battling over custody, and failing to see the big picture. Read on
for more information.

Choosing the Wrong Divorce Lawyer


Many individuals seek an aggressive divorce lawyer in order to try ensure they don’t end up with a poor deal. Yet, no
one can determine what will happen in court and going to court, by definition, entails using an adversarial approach.
Before you know it, your conflict has spun out of control and the truth has been twisted as it is presented to the judge
as fact.

At the opposite end of the spectrum, hiring a soft-spoken lawyer can be a problem as well. You could end up feeling
that you are the only one collaborating and compromising in the negotiations with your spouse, while your lawyer is not
protecting your best interests. Getting advice from someone who is not a lawyer or referring to a “friend of the family”
lawyer who does not practice family law can similarly leave you feeling vulnerable to your spouse’s legal demands.

Starting Off Your Case with a Bang


Conflict can erupt during a divorce or separation, especially if you start your divorce case by immediately going on the
attack. Your spouse may respond by “lawyering up,” and attacking you back. Disparaging remarks about your spouse
on social media could backfire as could speaking to your children negatively about your spouse. Before you know it,
you may have spent thousands of dollars, stirred up a large amount of personal drama and may end up hating your
spouse in the process.

Being Unaware of the Finances


If you did not handle the family finances during the marriage, divorce is not the time to continue to put trust in your
spouse financially. It is important that you each know the amount of money, assets and debt you both have. Be sure to
keep an accurate note of how much you each earn. You cannot divide your assets fairly if you do not know your net
worth and you may not be able to decide where you can afford to live if you don’t know how much income you have to
work with.

Fighting for Custody Without Understanding Its Meaning


Many individuals who are new to family law fight for sole custody but don’t
understand that the other parent will have access time regardless. They
correctly understand that having custody typically means that a higher
income parent will have to pay child support, but they otherwise confuse the
issues, thinking that custody and access are the same.

Failing to See the Big Picture


If you are angry at your spouse, you may want to fight about everything,
including who keeps the house. Many people forget that they may not be
able to afford the same home on their own after spending money on lawyer’s
fees to achieve a favourable settlement. Even a small gain from your spouse
may not be worth the investment in the end if you cannot afford to keep the
house.
custody biggest divorce mistakes

Get Help at Coley, Hennessy, Cassis, Ewasko


When you have a marriage breakdown, you need to be careful not to make mistakes that can haunt you for years to
come. If you handle your divorce the wrong way, you could end up losing in court and be wholly dissatisfied. Your
Edmonton family lawyer will be able to advise you to try help keep matters amicable with your spouse. By gaining some
knowledge, building your emotional resilience and instilling self-discipline, you can avoid major mistakes in a divorce that
could so easily occur. Trust the divorce lawyers at Coley, Hennessy, Cassis, Ewasko to know and advise you on how to
best approach your unique situation. We can answer your questions when we meet. Contact us at 1-877-460-2551

biggest divorce mistakes